Some people have no clue what they are talking about!

So, this happened to someone I work with....not me, but if it had I would have had a few things to say to this guy!

Ok, basically, someone I work with asked me if I do oblique exercises. I tell her that I do as much ab work as I can, including obliques. Then she wants to know if I use weights on some of my oblique exercises. I tell her that I do use weight on a lot of my ab work, including obliques.

Then she tells me this: She was at the gym doing some oblique exercises with weight. She said it was no more than 10 pounds and it was a workout she has been doing for over a year. The owner (male) of the gym comes out of his office and tells her to stop the exercise that she is doing. He then tells her that she is wasting her time doing that exercise because it won't make her waist smaller. Instead if will make her "bulky". She told him that she had been doing it for over a year. His response was something about how she shouldn't even use weights to workout because she will just get big and she doesn't want to get bulky. Doesn't she just want to slim down??

What a friggin' jerk!!

I told her that he might be the owner of the gym, but he clearly doesn't know anything about working out. There is NO WAY that she or anyone will get "bulky" from using weights. For that to happen you would have to take steroids. I've been lifting and lifting heavy for over 2 years and I have yet to get "bulky". Actually, I've done the opposite of getting bulky. I've lost an entire person from lifting heavy!

I also told her that if working out with weights made you "bulky" then Janelle should look like the Incredible Hulk! I just don't think that Janelle is anywhere near Incredible Hulk status.

Are Ashely and I posing with Janelle or Hulk?
It's just so confusing! All that weight
made us all so bulky!

From Google Images.
The Incredible Hulk or Janelle??
I just can't tell!!

   





Don't ask if you've already decided you aren't going to try!

So, this is something that happened to Janelle the other day, but it's happened to me too and I'm sure it's happened to some of you.

Basically, Janelle ran into a girl at the gym that worked out with us a few times. When she worked out with us she bragged and bragged about how "in shape" and "strong" she is. She said she is so strong that she never gets sore from lifting. She was talking about how she doesn't have any body fat and does so much cardio and is soooooo strong. Truth be told, and not being a judgemental bitch, but she did have body fat, she did have leg fat, she was not sooooo strong, but she did do a lot of cardio.

Anyway, she couldn't hang with us. She could not make it through our workout. She made an excuse to leave and then said wanted to stick to her cardio. In all actuality, she was insanely sore and didn't know how we could possibly still workout from day to day. We never saw her again, until the other day when Janelle ran into her.

Janelle didn't want to talk to her, but she came over to Janelle and wanted to talk. I'm kinda sad that I missed it, because she's been running and doing cardio, but she's gained about 10-15 pounds since we last saw her.

She told Janelle she didn't know why she was gaining weight and said she didn't need to do cardio because she'll get too bulky. She also maintained that she had little to no fat on her body. Then she asked Janelle what she should do to get the weight back off and stay in shape. Janelle told her the basics; eat better food, count calories, and workout more than cardio. She told Janelle that she didn't feel like eating right, but she knew how to if she had to. She also told Janelle that she doesn't need to lift. She then whined for about 10 more minutes and Janelle tried to ignore her.

Here's my issue with this girl and other people who have done this to me:

Don't come whine to me or anyone else who has been busting their butt to lose weight. Don't ask me or anyone else what we are doing, how we are doing it, and how they can get started too and then tell me or anyone else that they know it won't work for them!

For example: "Wow! You look awesome. I need to do something to get myself into shape. What are you doing? I want to do that!"

"Well, I count calories and workout out, a lot. I lift, I do cardio, I do whatever I can."

"Oh, that won't work for me. I've lifted before, it didn't do anything."

"I bet you didn't give it enough time."

"I don't want to get bulky, so I didn't lift heavy, and lifting doesn't work for me. I never get sore. I'm strong already."

"Lifting burns a lot of fat. Give it more time."

"I don't want to do that. I'll take a class or something and I don't really want to count calories."

I should respond to that by saying, "Then why in the hell are you wasting my time asking me questions if you already know you won't do anything different? You have to change something to lose weight. Thank you for wasting my time. Don't ask me to help you and shoot everything down. What I'm doing works. I've lost 110 pounds. Lifting won't make you bulky, I promise. You've watch too many infomercials. There is not quick fix. Get off your ass and move. I will never talk to you about this again because you have wasted 10 minutes of my life that I can't get back."

It is really irritating when people want you to help them and then decide that they know better than you. I know I'm not the only person this has happened to. It bothers me and I know it bothered Janelle. I wonder who else it bothers?

Irritation!

I was struggling to find something to write about today. I thought I was just going to give up. I had nothing to talk about pertaining to working out and losing weight. Then I went to the gym. I was all excited to do a million pull ups today (I have to tell you that I'm being sarcastic, because you can't see the look on my face) then I saw Hat Guy.

Ordinarily, Hat Guy is a source of entertainment, but today he was a source of irritation. I don't know why, but he was more annoying today than he's ever been. I think he was more vulgar too. That might be it. He was really saying nasty things today, and talking about football like he's an expert, and....and being really freaking loud!

I told Janelle that we had to go to the ladies side because I had to get away from him. I was sure I was going to fight him if I had to listen to him anymore. Actually, I think I said, "I'm having visions of going off on Hat Guy. I might get in a fight. Do you think I'd win?"

We went to the ladies side, but it didn't help. The wall doesn't go all the way up and I could still hear him. Janelle just looked at my face and started laughing. I couldn't help it, I started mocking him really loudly. I HOPE he heard me. I was so irritated.

I do have to say though, it was good workout. I think I was channeling all my rage into my workout. You know, since I couldn't really fight Hat Guy.

The workout funk is gone!

My workout funk is over and it has nothing to do with me actually working out, it has to do with....Hat Guy. I often mention Hat Guy, and if you have no clue who he is you can read about him here, here, and here. I know I have mentioned him more, but those posts were specifically about the joy he brings me when I'm working out.

Thank you Hat Guy for being at the gym yesterday. I have not been in the best workout mood lately and it's been a real chore to do anything. Yesterday was no exception.

Janelle and I were actually able to get to the gym at the same time and we had to workout on the coed side because of the equipment we needed.

Hat Guy was out there too and he was just as I expect him to be....loud and obnoxious. He over compensates for everything he does because he's so short. I mean, he's tiny. He's a short guy. He has worked hard to bulk himself up, but only he upper body. His legs are teeny tiny. He talks loud and I mean LOUD. He wants everyone to hear everything he has to say. I used to get super annoyed by him, but then I realized that everything he says is totally rediculious and Janelle and I just laugh at everything he says. Yesterday was no exception.

I don't totally even know how to describe his antics from yesterday. There were a few people that were talking with him and, of course, he was yelling his responses back. (I mean, they were 2 feet away from each other....the only reason to be that loud is to make sure everyone hears you!)

Basically, here's some of what Janelle and I heard.

"Yea man, you can tag along with me when I'm working out. I'll show you how to workout. If you can keep up, you can tag along."

"When do I workout? Whenever man. I have parameters that I stay between, but whatever do in that time is what I do. I mix it up. I do singles, I do all over, I do what I do You've gotta have parameters."

When someone asked about how he learned the best way to workout and the best way to plan workouts he responded, "To understand, you gotta not understand, ya know?"

He continued to talk about the art of understanding by not understanding (that sounds like some ancient Chinese wisdom right there!) and said, "I tried to follow the rules of working out, but coloring inside the lines didn't get me no where!"

He then started to refer back to the guy who wants to "tag along" and see his workouts, "Yea, like that guy who wants to tag along. He can, but he's asking for routine. I don't have routine. I have parameters. I told him, give me two weeks, two weeks of insanity!"

Ok, here are some more random quotes from him:

"I call it ad libbin," in reference to making up workouts.

"Yea, that guy said he never sees me workout my legs. I do my legs everyday. I just do it fast because I hate legs. Open your eyes man, pay attention. I do it everyday."

"The cortisol and testerone don't like each other. They butt heads." This was in reference to lifting and doing cardio in one day and in what order you should complete them. You also have to bump fists with yourself when saying this.

Anyway, it probably seems totally mean that I get joy from the crazy things this guy says, but he makes a complete spectacle of himself. I used to get really annoyed and angry whenever he was around. Now I just laugh. He is completely rediculious......and short.....shorter than me!

I'm sore and it's your fault!

I was going to post about my weekend, but then I heard this at the gym today....

First, let me try to set the scene for you.

Janelle and I were walking out of the gym and to do that we have to go through the lobby area where the "sales" people sit.

One of our favorite (I wish you could see the sarcasm in the word favorite) "sales" people was sitting at his desk with a 2 liter of Diet Mountain Dew and a 12 pack of ramen noodles. He usually has a little foam dart gun too, but I'm not sure where that was today.

Anyway, he was on the phone so we only heard one side of the conversation, but you could totally tell what the person was saying.

Sales guy, "Well who worked you out?" Stops to listen. "Well no, that's normal. You might even be sore for a few more days. You did a good workout."

So the gist of the conversation was someone wondering why they were sore from working out.

I mean, who goes to the gym, works out, and then calls to complain because they are sore? Weirdos.

Janelle had to go back and do a second workout today too. I went for a little bit, but I couldn't stay very long. Janelle calls me after she leaves to tell me that the same sales guy was giving her "advice" on preparing for her upcoming competition.

He was telling her to that she needs to build more muscle by eating half a chicken breast every hour. Then proceeded to pull a poster out of his desk to show her. The post was of a male body builder.

Janelle was like, "Well, he's a body builder and a man. I'm a girl and I do figure."

What a strange day at the gym. I'm sorry that I missed that conversation today. I probably would have laughed uncontrollably.

Did you really just justify that?

           A few days ago I went to the gym a little early in hopes that I would be able to get in a few minutes of tanning. Well, I was wrong. When I walked back to the changing area which is also the tanning waiting area it was packed with people who clearly were only there to tan.

            I decided to just go change and do some extra cardio. So I went into one of the changing stalls and realized that was the first time during the day I had a chance to sit down. I decided to sit and chill for a few minutes and that’s when I heard some fantastic conversations.

            The first one came from a group of ladies waiting to tan. Simply enough they were talking about how they wish there was more time in the day to workout. I was very confused by this conversation. I wanted to go over there and say, “Excuse me, but you’re in a gym. You obviously pay for a membership here. Instead of sitting here for 30 or more minutes waiting to tan why don’t you go walk on the treadmill?” Obviously, I just sat there in my little stall staring at the wall with a look on confusion. I’m pretty good at thinking horrible things, but most of the time I can keep those thoughts to myself. I was in shock that some would say something like that in a gym, but more shocked that the other people waiting were agreeing with it!

            Then they started talking about what they were going to eat for dinner and a different lady that was over there started talking about how she’s been really good lately and she thinks she deserves dessert after dinner. That’s cool; I guess, but she was talking about how she made a pie and brownies because she couldn’t decide what dessert she wanted, and was probably going to eat both. Ok, that’s just friggin’ overkill. Come on now! Really??? Pie and brownies? Maybe some of that time you spent making desserts could have been better spent at the gym. I know I shouldn’t care what these ladies do with their time, but I don’t want to hear about it. The gym is an awful place to have conversations about eating dessert and wanting to workout but never finding the time. To me, you just look silly.

            The other conversation I overheard is not really a weight loss conversation, but a phone conversation that really got my blood boiling. So a woman was changing in the next stall and she was on the phone. (Side note: our gym has a no cell phone policy. There are signs posted all over the place. No one pays attention to the signs. They are there so the other members don’t have to be bothered by other people chatting it up on the phone while at the gym. I wish this lady would have followed the sign.)  So I’m gathering that this lady was talking to her child because she was asking about games, conditioning, practice, and fees. Anyway, here is what I heard.

Lady on the phone: “Well wasn’t the last game last night?” (pause) “What do you mean conditioning starts tomorrow?” (pause) “No basketball is over.” (pause) “So baseball conditioning starts tomorrow?” (pause) “I don’t have time for this sh*t. I have a life too.” (pause) “Well, I just don’t even know. How much is this sh*t gonna cost me?” (pause) “Well, we’re gonna have to talk this over. Don’t expect me to come to all of these games too. I have to workout. I’m hanging up.”

            Ok, I’m going to omit my thoughts about this lady’s parenting skills, but what flippin’ message are you sending to your kid? I’m glad that you think it’s important to workout, but you need to pass that same message to your kids. At least this lady’s kid wants to play sports. Let him! Encourage him! Don’t let him develop lazy, unhealthy habits and become an obese adult! I really, really wanted to say a few words to this lady, but I just glared at her when we both walked out of the stalls.

            So, the gym is never a dull place. There is always something going on. After I heard those conversations I was frustrated for a multitude of reasons, so I tried to channel all of my frustration into my workout. I think it worked because I was wiped out after I left the gym. I still wanted to tan, but I figured I would snap if I had to sit, wait, and listen to people whine about wishing they had time to workout!

Hey man, nice hat.

Ok, anyone who spends any amount of time at a co-ed gym has seen a ton of crazy things and crazy people. I could write a book just about the crazy people I encounter at the gym, but a short blog will have to do for now and focusing on one guy will have to do as well.

So, let my try to paint a picture of this guy for you. You’ve all seen a guy like this. In a nut shell, he can be described as having “short man syndrome”. This guy is short; probably around 5'5”. He is fairly muscular, but not as muscular as he thinks he is. He only works his upper body and not his lower body. He has little chicken legs. He wears muscle tanks that are too big and walks with his upper body puffed up. My sister likes to call it “invisible lat syndrome”. He also wears a knit snow cap all the time, but as silly as I think he looks, it’s not just his appearance and hat that annoy me. 

He is the loudest, most obnoxious dude in the gym. He is always trying to give out workout advice, but not even in a nice way. He has that mentality that he knows everything and you know nothing. Most of his advice is unsolicited as well.

One day he was telling another guy, who was twice the size he was and clearly this guy knew what he was doing, but this tiny guy really wanted to give him “advice”. He was telling him, loudly, to eat Kobe Beef because it’s a white meat cow, but the stores don’t tell you that. He then was telling this same guy that his form was off, and he needed to use lighter weights. Another time he told a group of very obviously fit guys that you can’t work out 2 days in a row because the blood won’t go to the muscles you just worked out.

Those situations are so funny because this guy has no clue what he’s talking about. He was giving advice to guys that had more knowledge on lifting than he does. It’s also so funny because this guy stands around giving out unwanted advice, but never seems to lift a weight. He stands near a lot of weights, but never seems to use them.

I think my favorite thing about this guy was when we heard him talking about his hat that he always wears. It was obvious that the guy who asked him was making fun of him and asked why he always wears the hat. He responded in a very matter-of-fact way, “I wear this hat everywhere. It would be like leaving the house without my pants on!” Janelle looked at me and really quietly and slowly said back to me, “without…his…pants…on.” We both just laughed and I’ve got news for that guy; forgetting your hat and forgetting your pants are two very different things.

I just can’t believe how loud he talks. He wants everyone to hear him. He wants to be knowledgeable, but he’s not. He’s also not very nice around Janelle and I; probably because we can lift more than him.

There are other guys like him, but he’s the worst one we’ve come across. There are other guys that are loud and talk about inappropriate things, but this guy takes the cake. Anyone who has spent any amount of time in the gym has come across a guy like this. Maybe other people don’t notice these things, but I’m a people watcher. I’m constantly checking my surroundings and the gym is an awesome place to watch all kinds of people. 

New Year at the gym.

            I hate the gym at the first of the year. I’m all about people making resolutions to get in shape, lose weight, or be healthier, but I can’t stand it when you clog up the gym and have no clue what you are doing. Yesterday at the gym, I about lost is on a few of them!

            Here’s the situation. I woke up in a bad mood. I’m not sure why, but I did. As the day went on, I started feeling better, but when I was at the gym I was at my height of annoyance. Being at the gym with all the “Resolution Gym Goers” was probably a bad idea. They are always in the way, and not courteous.

I was going through my workout and I was a little ahead of Janelle and Ashley, so I went over to the “butt blaster” to get started on the next set. I was putting weight on the machine and making sure I had what I needed. Out of no where this girl walks up and takes a 10 pound plate off my machine. I stared at her, and she just walked over to this ab machine and started working her lower back. I thought to myself, “Someone really wants me to get in a fight today. I’m going to hit this girl!” Then I stared at her for a few minutes to size her up and decided to let it go, but talk about her loudly to Janelle and Ashley. That way she would feel uncomfortable and leave.

So, while I was staring at her to size her up I decided that she was just a “Resolution Gym Goer.” Her clothes and shoes were new. She looked like she had done her hair and makeup before coming to the gym and she had no clue what she was doing. She looked like she was having a seizure instead of doing low back raises. By the end of March she will be bored and I’ll never see her again.

I did start talking about her really loud. I know she heard me. She was only 3 feet away from me and she didn’t have on headphones. Janelle walked over and we were rearranging the weights on the machine. I looked at her and said, “Be careful with your weights. People will walk right over and take them when you are using them.” Janelle was like, “Oh, really? It’s like that today?” I told her what happened and then said, “Someone really wants me to get in a fight today.”

After I said that, the girl walked off. When she came back, I grabbed the weight and added it back to our stack. Maybe that was an a-hole move, but hey, if you are going to be in the gym, have some gym etiquette. Don’t just take things that other people are using, and since I really couldn’t hit her, I had to do something.

I can’t wait until April when all the “Resolution Gym Goers” have fallen off the wagon. Then the gym will be nice and quiet again. I know I’m not alone in this thought. I hear it every year from people at the gym and from other people I know that work out regularly. Like I said before, I want everyone to go to the gym and be healthy, but be courteous. If not, people like me are only going to be able to bite our tongues for so long.

You are at the gym...put the soda down!

           When I think of the gym, I think of sweat, hard work, water, classes, etc. I don’t think of food, soda, candy, and coffee. Ok, I do think of those things, but only when do I get to have any of those things? What I mean, is food, soda, candy, and coffee aren’t the images brought to mind when I think of going to the gym. I’m apparently in a minority with those thoughts.

            The gyms I go to are full of food, pop cans, candy wrappers, and expensive coffee drinks. It’s only been the past six months that I’ve noticed this. Actually, I think Janelle noticed first, but promptly pointed it out to Ashley and me. We were on the floor doing something, and Janelle was like, “Gross, look at all that trash under the treadmill!” We all looked under the treadmill and there were chocolate candy wrappers all over the place.

            That made me wonder what the eff someone is thinking when they get to the gym. Is it something like, “Wow, I need to get on the treadmill today, but I really want chocolate. I know, I’ll walk on the treadmill and eat my bon bons. It’s like killing two birds with one stone.” I bet that person was really proud of themselves for coming up with that idea.

            After that, I started paying more attention while I was in the gym. I saw people drinking soda instead of water. There were people walking in and finishing fast food, and people walking around drinking Starbucks. There are people bringing candy with them and eating it while riding bikes or walking on the treadmills. It was really gross.

 I won’t even tell you what some of the employees eat and drink in plain view of members. I mean really, you are supposed to convince me that a healthy life style is the way to go and that you are happy and healthy. When you eat a fast food, wash it down with a Mountain Dew, and then step out for a cigarette, I’m having doubts that you know anything about anything and I think working at gym is the wrong career for you. (Just a side note: that does not apply to my Huber ladies. They would never do those things in front of members!)

It just makes me wonder what they are thinking when they come to the gym with all that junk. They are doing nothing to help themselves! Why even bother? On the other hand, I have to eat at the gym every so often. Like I said the other day, I have eat every three hours, no matter where, no matter what. I at least bring something mildly healthy, like Clif Bars and nuts. I have been known to keep going through my workout while eating too. One time I continued with the leg press while eating mixed nuts. I’m sure people were thinking I was crazy. Oh well.

            It’s not really eating at the gym that’s bothering me; it’s what people are eating at the gym. Don’t bring pop; don’t bring fast food or candy. Number one: I’m mad that you have it and I don’t. Number two: any number of other people in there might tackle you to get to that delicious junk food you are eating because they, themselves, have sworn off junk food and would kill just to get a taste of it. Number three: you just made yourself look uneducated for making such a stupid decision about snacks in the gym and I will forever file you under “Stupid People”.