Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Going to the gym and being a stop on the tour.

“Hello…no, I’m at the gym…..ok….can I call you later?” I feel like that conversation has replaced another conversation I used to have a lot, “hello….no, I’m at the bar…ok…can I call you later?” Obviously the gym is no bar, but it’s not a bad replacement, and I get to go with Janelle and Ashley so I have people to talk while I’m there. Also, I think you should know that I do go 5 or 6 days a week, every week, no fail. I’m only telling you that so you’ll feel in awe of my dedication. :) 

Honestly, going to the gym is not that bad. Some days it can be difficult to find the motivation to get there, but knowing that I’m going there to meet up with other people makes it easier. Also, knowing that I get to “people watch” when I get there is motivational as well.

There have been some odd encounters at the gym though. When I first started going with Janelle, we were doing some crazy ab workout. We were on some crazy thing like 8 sets of hyper oblique uppy downy something or other. You would think I would know what we were doing since I do this stuff all the time, but I still have juvenile names and descriptions for most exercises and machines. 

Anyway, this lady wearing khaki walking shorts, iron on flower t-shirt, and fanny pack walks over to me and tells me that I’ve been using this particular piece of equipment for a long time. I think she was working undercover as a gym cop or something, and making sure no one used the equipment for too long. Oh yea, she was also drinking a can of Pepsi from a straw. I don’t really know what I said back to her, but I probably told her that I would be done soon if she needed to use it. I remember her asking what I was even doing, and then she took a long drink from her straw. I do remember pointing to Janelle who was across the gym and telling her that I was working out with a friend and I was doing a workout that was designed for her, but wouldn’t hurt for me to do it too. This part I do remember, because she looked in the direction of Janelle and then said to me, “Oh, you can’t do the same workout as her! Look at her; she can do so much more than you can! You shouldn’t be doing that much. You’re going to get hurt! You’re trying too hard!” Now, I almost flew into a rage, but kept it together and told her that I would be just fine, but what I really wanted to say was, “Listen here lady; you’re dressed like you’re going bird watching and drinking an effing Pepsi from a straw, at the gym! I’m not taking advice from anyone who drinks pop at the gym. You could have at least brought a diet Pepsi.” A few minutes later she told me that I had inspired her to do 4 sets of everything instead of 3 sets, and I’ve never seen her since that day. Maybe she’s been bird watching.

Another memorable moment at the gym was with Janelle when we were doing a shoulder workout. We were in a tiny corner of the gym and the place was nearly deserted. We were almost done with our workout and doing lateral raises where we held weights in our hands and held our arms out for 30 seconds at a time. As we were starting, we heard one of the employees coming by with a potential member. The employee came over to where we were standing and told the potential member that the little area, “is used for ab exercises and there is great equipment here to use.” Then the employee and potential member looked at Janelle and I, and we were just standing there, each of looking like a lower case t, holding perfectly still, staring at the clock, and having a pleasant conversation. The employee had this totally confused look on her face, and then said, “well, or it can be used for whatever it is these girls are doing.” When they were out of earshot, we both almost died laughing.

More recently, I thought I heard a gym employee talking about me to potential members. These girls were kind of heavy and they were they kind of girls that wear pajama pants, tight tank tops with clever sayings, and crocs to the gym; the kind of girls that I can’t stop staring at, because I’m trying to figure out if they looked in a mirror before they left the house. Anyway, these girls keep looking at me so I’m assuming that they know that I keep watching them. Then I noticed that the employee keeps gesturing toward me. I decided to figure out what they were all doing, so I turned down my iPod and pretended to work out near them. That’s when I realized what was going on, and they were talking about me! I heard the employee say, “And that girl over there has lost 100 pounds in less than a year from working out here!” I nearly fell on the floor. I thought, “Whoa lady, I’ve lost a lot of weight, but not quite 100 pounds!” I knew then that I had officially become a stop on the gym tour and a selling point for new members. Maybe they should give me a free membership because I’m apparently bringing them new business.

I really haven’t had many encounters that were bad, but a lot of people want to give you advice or tell you that you’re doing something wrong. Usually, I just smile and nod at those people and thank them for the advice. Of course I curse under my breath when they walk away, but I have come to the conclusion that everyone thinks they are a personal trainer and everyone thinks they are a nutritionist. Sometimes I will let people know that I’m happy to hear their thoughts and concerns, but that I’ve found something that works for me, and that’s what I’m sticking to. I tell them if what they say works for them, then wonderful. The same thing is not going to work for everyone. Why do you think we have all of those crazy diets?